Perkygoff Manifesto

right! here we go! it seems, that in these passing times, it has become
 fashionable, nay, perhaps even (scoff!) *required* of goths very much like
 ourselves that they reflect upon life itself with the most cynical and morose
 of countenances. we, the perkygoths of the world, stand in the face of this,
 and reclaim our heritage as follows!

	1. we realize, and perhaps even declare publically, the simple
	    fact that our attire and decorative tastes are downright
	    *silly*, yet in the face of this impractical and sometimes
	    even inconvenient nature of things, we LAUGH! yes, all those
	    skirts make the boys have to piss like girls, but hey! it
	    contributes toward greater understanding between the sexes!

	2. there *is* no "standard" behaviour or code of any sort for a
	    member of the so-called "underground", you silly gits! why,
	    who ever thought of anything so bleeding preposterous?! if i
	    want to skip across the dance floor to see a friend, well
	    damn it all, im *going* to! and about that smile i was
	    wearing last week at the club, yes, it *was* mine! no, my
	    mother did *not* make me wear it!

	3. um, just cause i look like a "goth" right this very instant
	    does *not* preclude me *not* looking like a goth sometime
	    tommorrow. after the shock and horror of this realization
	    passes by, you will note that its actually quite fun to
	    inject a little variety into things.

	4. on *that* note, neither are we required to listen *solely*
	    to "goth" or "death rock" or "darkwave". we *are*, however,
	    allowed to physically assault the next person who scowls at
	    us for slapping that p-funk, hard techno, or riot grrrl
	    record on the turntable immediately after playing sisters
	    or somesuch.

	4.5. and while im thinking about it, were also allowed to
	      clobber anyone at a club who whines about the dj playing
	      too much "goth" and not enough "death rock" or something
	      of that ilk.

	5. but, if theres one thing we *mustnt* ever do, under any
	    circumstances, it is lord our knowledge over that of
	    others. if there is a sin, dear perkygoths, it is
	    self-righteousness and pomposity. we simply *mustnt* go out
	    and wave all that nifty info we just read out of good old
	    mr. mercers handy-dandy goth guide as if wed known it all
	    along. cause face it, most of us werent even there when
	    half of that stuff happenned. (there *are* exceptions, of
	    course, but they arent allowed to lord their knowledge
	    either, nor are they supposed to reflect in a nostalgic and
	    whiney manner)

	6. oh! right! back to perky! um, stomping in mud puddles in
	    perfectly acceptable. dancing and *realizing* that you look
	    like a complete idiot is heartily encouraged. continuing to
	    dance, no matter how amny other peple are also noting that
	    you look like an idiot, is even more heartily encouraged.
	    remember kids, the looks or the lifestyle? the lifestyle,
	    of course. youre a perkygoth. dont just look like a looney,
	    *act* like one! its much more fufilling than primping in a
	    mirror all night.

	7. um, i forgot the rest. probably didnt even think of them to
	    begin with. ive prolly lied about everything so far. uh, am
	    i getting paid to do this? what was i saying?

	7.5. just remember, fun is your middle name. or at least its
	      *somewhere* in your vocabulary. whatever youre doing,
	      think to yourself: "am i having FUN?" if no, time to do
	      something else. a short attention span means you dont
	      have *time* to get bored and mope!

			let *this* be our ralling cry!

	    "DO NOT STAND IN OUR WAY! WE WILL WALK AROUND YOU!"

(inspiration credits to: huggy bear, girlfrenzy, the polecats, and that coffee
 i had last night. its worn off now, and not affecting me, but just thinking
 about it... whoosh! time for more!)

lurve (whoa-oh, catch that drug...),
joelsie-poo