Date: Mon, 15 Jun 1998 10:47:41 -0400
From: Kenneth Nagle <Kenneth.Nagle@EY.COM>
Subject: Floating, Falling, Sweet Intoxication (or why i'm gullible)

I left my ID tag to get into my office at home today, so
I had to go into the main reception office on the 2nd 
floor to get a temporary badge- otherwise I have to wait
on the kindness of strangers to let me in.

Well, I went to the receptionist and told her my sob story-
she looked at me and quite honestly* told me that they had 
just given out the last of their spare IDs and that I'll
have to have someone let me in wherever I wanted to go. 

I slunk away, dreading the fact that everytime Deborah 
had a problem with her computer, I'd have to tell her to wait
at the staircase door for me to come down, because otherwise I
would have the option of:

1: Going into the staircase**, walking all the way down to the
1st floor, taking the elevator up to the 6th floor, then banging
on the glass until someone let me in.

2: Going down the staircase to the sixth floor, banging on the
door until someone lets me out of the staircase, then politely
asking them if they'll please let me in through the glass door.

3: Taking the elevator down one floor (which I would never do 
because I hate when people do that and I would have to kill
myself) and then having to bang on the glass door anyways.

4: Throwing myself out a window on the 7th floor and hoping I 
somehow miraculously end up somewhere near Deborah's computer,
which I'm sure that she has thrown out the window in rage 
because it won't print.

So I have consigned myself to various indignities and possible
death involved in my job today, when the receptionist says 
"No, I'm kidding. We actually have some right here." She hands
me an ID badge with a big red V on it (is it my own Scarlet
Letter? or is this a sign that I'm going to become a reptillian
alien which eats bugs and rats out of jars***). I triumphantly
march to the elevator, hit the button for 7, get off the elevator,
march to the door, raise my badge, and ready myself for the
glorious new day.

The security lock flashes red. I'm trapped in the central elevator
lobby on the 7th floor- and I cannot even get near a window to
throw myself out.

								Ken


*- Or so gullible me thought

**- "Take the staircase to the first floor
	Turn the key and slowly unlock the door
	As a man breathes into a saxophone
	Through the walls we hear the city groan
	Outside it's America
	Outside it's America
	America"

***- Well, I don't look like a Hester, so it must be the second.